If your child is a frequent liar and you have tried all the traditional methods of advice and guidance without success, we offer you 15 ideas for treating children’s lying. These ideas were presented by some participants in a workshop in Bahrain to discuss lying in children.
How to discover my child’s lying
The characteristics of a lying child are as the following:
- Stuttering and stammering: If your daughter is usually calm and cohesive, stuttering during a conversation may be a sign that she may be lying.
- Eye-contact communication: Notice changes in eye contact and staying away from direct sight or nervous movements may be signs of lying.
- Repetition: Frequent recourse to the same words or phrases may be an effort to confirm a lie.
- Fidgeting: If your daughter shows signs of resentment or restlessness while talking, it may be a sign of her insincerity.
- Changing the voice: Notice any changes in her tone of voice or speed of speech, as these can be signs of insincerity.
- Gossiping: Talking excessively or constant chatter may be a way to hide the truth.
- Defensing: Defensive reactions or avoidance of subjects may indicate that something is hiding behind the curtain.
- Inconsistency: Notice any discrepancy in their stories or details, as inconsistency can be evidence of lying.
15 ideas for treating children’s lying
Some of these ideas may be unconventional or disliked, but they were intended for participation and reflection by members, among the ideas that were put forward are the following:
- Punishing the child by not buying what he wants and linking it to his lying.
- Donating a portion of their pocket money every time they lie or contributing to the household expenses from their allowance.
- Hanging pictures of the child upside down in his room every time he lies.
- Painting the child’s nails blue every time he lies and coloring one finger or nail.
- Forcing the child to eat something he doesn’t like and putting it in his mouth every time he lies.
- Designating a yellow or red outfit called the “lying outfit,” which the child wears every time he lies to embarrass himself.
- Cutting a very small part of the child’s hair every time he lies, so they worry about his hair and doesn’t lie again.
- The idea of overturned cups in the living room, where we put colored cups and flip one every time the child lies.
- Using a loud and annoying whistle every time the child lies, so everyone knows there is a liar.
- A candy and chocolate box, where the child takes one if he is honest in his talk.
- A star chart placed in the child’s room, where we erase a star every time he lies, so he values the stars and keep him by not lying.
- Punishment by standing alone on the wall or jumping 20 times.
- One of the funny ideas suggested by a participant was to make the child smell something he dislikes.
- Designing a half-meter-long rope and every time the child lies, we tie another rope to it to see how long the rope will be in the end.
- Punishing the child by making him stay silent for a quarter or half an hour every time he lies.
You can also read about: Our children and alternative emotions.
We presented 15 unconventional ideas for treating children’s lying, which were discussed in the workshop. It is essential for children to understand that lying is a bad habit that displeases Allah and His Messenger and that there is no such thing as white or black lies.
Lying is only permissible in three cases: during war because war is deceit, to reconcile between spouses or to reconcile between disputants. Other than that, lying is not permissible under any circumstances, no matter what the consequences may be. Honesty is the best policy.