Many parents fall into a serious mistake, which is the Differentiation between children, whether intentionally or unintentionally, but the results of this will not be endearing or satisfactory to all parties, it is a great scourge on the family and society, not only because of the feeling of frustration, despair and hatred of his brother caused to the neglected child, but it generates a sense of ego in the spoiled child, and makes him a hateful person who looks at his brother with a look of contempt and victory over him because he won the love of his father and mother alone, and what is left behind from this treatment Of the negative consequences later we will show you in this article.
Reasons for Differentiation between children
Some parents may differentiate between their children without realizing it, but some of them deliberately differentiate for any reason that does not justify any of the bad actions they do towards their children, but they are inherited, and the most prominent reasons are the following:
- Gender difference: Some prefer males to females and exaggerate it under the pretext that the boy is a pride and bears the name of his father, so they make the project of a man who is authoritarian and incomprehensible, and others prefer females for their tenderness and exaggerate their pampering to the extent that they reach the neglect of males.
- Age: You find some parents prefer the eldest son and give him all the powers and advantages, but many prefer the youngest and this is a greater burden and danger.
- Different qualities: whether in beauty, handsomeness, intelligence, etc., which makes parents tend to a certain child from the rest of his siblings.
Negative effects of segregation between children
- The child has many psychological effects that affect him and may expose him to depression, isolation and loss of self-confidence.
- A feeling of hatred, jealousy and hatred between brothers.
- The spoiled feeling of excessive selfishness and to get everything for him alone.
- A child may seek love, safety and respect among strangers because he does not find them among his family, and this may expose him to risks and bad people.
- Feelings of distress and sadness persist even as he grows up that accompany him throughout his life and may affect the way he raises his children.
- A child may turn from a righteous son to a disobedient son, and he does not accept the advice of his parents and does not listen to them.
You should know, O father, that separating between children is a great crime, it is not only abhorrent, but it is forbidden by Sharia and is not permissible, as the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Be fair among your children, be fair among your children, be just among your children.”
