The Islamic approach for raising children must be in different way of using, because children are the seeds of life, the seeds of hope and the apple of man’s eye. They are the builders of tomorrow and its men, its thinkers, its forearms, the shields of its nation and the protectors of its stability. For this reason, Islam directed its attention to their upbringing. So that the community can be happy with them and they will ascend the society. Islam’s care has included all aspects of the individual’s life to grow in an integrated way and it’s a growth that includes: his body, his soul, his morals and his mind also by preserving this high style of refined education, a good citizen is brought up, who knows his rights and duties, in addition to build the strong Muslim individual, who lives with his correct faith, his conscious mind and his strong morals.
And we are the nation of Islam, if we want to honor, glory and supremacy for ourselves, we have to return to the essence of our religion, we have to educate the Muslim generations on a pattern of true manhood and generous humanity, the pattern that we felt in the first Muslims when they were strength in the mind, spirit, creation and body.
The Islamic approach for raising children
The Islamic approach for raising children should be integrated. We must formulate them in a consistent formula with what we believe in in terms of beliefs and noble ideals, derived from the Book of God – Glory be to Him – and from the Sunnah of His Messenger (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) one of the writers says:
Allah-Almighty said: “Wealth and children are the adornments of the life in this world and the enduring righteous deeds are better with your Lord for reward and better for hope.” [Al-Kahf: 46].
Ibrahim pleaded with his Lord to grant him offspring, and he said: “My Lord, grant me from among the righteous. So We gave him good tidings of a gentle boy”[As-Saffat: 100, 101].
And Zakariya (peace be upon him) supplicated and said: “And I fear the freed slaves behind me and my wife was barren, so grant me a guardian from Yourself. He inherits from me and from the family of Jacob and my lord please him.” [Maryam: 5, 6]
Many writers and poets portrayed their feelings of love for children, despite their diversity and color emanate from one emotion and one nature, which is a nature of pure love and sincere affection.
Al-Ahnaf said to Muawiyah when he was angry at his son, Yazid, who deserted him: “O Commander of the Faithful, our children are the fruits of our hearts and the pillar of our backs, they love you forever and do not look at them angrily. Do not be heavy on them cause they will wish for your death, hate your closeness and get bored of your life.
The child is not only owned by his parents; Rather, he is the property of the nation, his parents and the nation are happy to the extent of their success in raising him well and preparing him for his mission in life physically, morally and mentally. Raising a child is a joint duty, between parents and the state at home and school. However, the first duty and the fullest burden falls on the shoulders of the parents, especially the mother in the case of infancy and young age, Because the mother’s influence on her child in this case is strong.
Islam has appreciated the seriousness of this influence and it is forbidden for a Muslim to get married with a disbeliever woman Fearing that children will be tempted in their religion by following them and this is the Islamic approach for proper children upbringing.
Imam Al-Ghazali said: “A boy is a trust in his parent’s hands and his pure heart is precious naive jewel devoid of every inscription and image, he is amenable to everything that is engraved on and everything that is inclined to, if he grew up on goodness, he will be happy in this world and the hereafter, his parents shared his reward and every teacher. And if he grow up on evil things and be neglected like animals, he will be wretched and destroyed and the burden will rest on the neck of his guardian”.
Allah – Almighty said: “O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire that need people and stones to fuel up, it has angels over it who are harsh and stern. They do not disobey God as He commands them and they do what they are commanded.” [Al-Tahrim: 6]
Islam has guided general rules for raising a child physically, scientifically and morally, so it has guided what strengthens his body and his habit by practicing types of sports, such as competition, wrestling, archery and swimming, the Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him ) was the practical example in that. On the authority of Salamah bin Al-Akwa’ (may God be pleased with him) said: “The Prophet passed by a group of those who embraced Islam and they were racing then said: “Shoot from Banu Ismael, for your father was an archer. Shoot while I was with Banu So-and-so.” He said: So one of the two teams grabbed. With their hands, he asked (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him): “Why don’t you throw?” They asked: “How do we throw when you are with them?” The Prophet replied: “Throw, I am with all of you”.
On the authority of Omar bin Al-khatab (may God be pleased with him) said: “Teach your children swimming and order them to jump using horses (Equestrian).”
Religious teachings for raising children in Quran
Islam called for education the children in affirmation, it said:”Seeking knowledge is obligatory for every Muslim”, and Islam did not limit them to one color only, except that he believes the first science in education is religious science, because it is the means to happiness in this world and the Hereafter, with the teachings of religion souls settle down, hearts reassure and they strive in their affairs satisfied, not being overwhelmed by success, nor humiliated by failure, Because it entrusts the fate of matters to God, makes education the right of the child to his father, each of the male and female takes what is appropriate for him and helps him in his message and his job, so the woman should take from him what he prepares to be a good husband, who pleases her husband and does well in the affairs of her house and a good mother who improves Raising her children, directing them to a virtuous and happy life, and the man may take from her what he prepares for the message he chooses for himself, and help him to collect his livelihood.
Islam has guided general rules in virtues and social etiquette, which are the highest that reach in the most prestigious societies, represented in the verses of the Noble Quran, the work of the Messenger (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him), the work of his companions and he called on parents to get close to their children and raise them up as a righteous generation endowed with morals and virtues, so that the family may be happy with them and the nation will be happy with them. Allah – the Almighty said: “We have ordered man being to take care on his parents, his mother gave him birth in weakness and weaned him in two years. Give thanks to me and your parents. And if they strive with you to associate with Me anyone that of which you do not know, do not obey them and be their companion in this world with kindness”. [Luqman: 14]
And on the authority of Umar bin Abi Salamah that he was a young boy in the lap of the Messenger of God (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) and his hand was bouncing around on the plate when he ate i.e.: moving in the plate without regularity, so the Messenger of God said: “O boy, say Bismallah and eat with your right hand, eat what is towards you”. Many manners that were elaborated in the Sunnah and proven by the correct transmission of the Companions.
You can also read about: The Art of raising children.
How did Islam guide to kindness with children?
Islam has guided to kindness with children in education and guidance. So that they do not become alienated from them and do not become discontented with them, so that it is instilled in their souls in an outpouring of pure paternal sympathy. On the authority of the Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) that if he saw Fatima (may God be pleased with her) coming, he would stand up for her from his seat and take her hand to kiss her. One day a Bedouin came to him and asked: “Do you kiss boys, so why do we kiss them? the prophet asked: “Do you have the hope that God will remove mercy from your heart?”.
Islam called for the obligation of fairness between boys and girls in giving, so that they grow up loving and cooperating, it denied to distinguish between boys and girls, not to carry their differentiation on the disobedience of parents.
Parents should eat with his children to make them feel happy, to guide them and care about them. On the authority of Sufyan (may God be pleased with him) said: “We have been informed that God and His angels pray for people of a household who eat together”.
With these teachings, Islam calls on parents to make their children happy and the nation be happy with them. This happiness is the goal of Islam.
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