There are many misguided educational concepts that parents fall into, thinking that just being parents gives them ownership over their children and requires them to provide all the evidence of goodness, kindness, loyalty, and obedience. However, there are many things that parents need to understand and provide to their children. Together, we will learn about some of the misguided concepts that parents fall into.
Misguided educational concepts
Many parents may think that they are on the right path and following the correct Islamic upbringing, and they strive to make their children happy. However, they often fall victim to some misguided educational concepts, which include the following:
1- Knowing the mistake is not enough to prevent it
Some parents think that simply telling their child that something is wrong is enough to prevent them from doing it again. If the child repeats the mistake, they may receive a lot of blame, punishment, and anger from the parent.
Dear parent, your child or teenager may not know why a behavior is wrong in the first place, and may not know how to get rid of it. Therefore, you need to guide your child towards the right behavior and how to get rid of wrong behaviors, so that they can learn and understand why they are being punished and not repeat it again.
2- Your child is not a copy of you
Some parents believe that their child should be a copy of themselves in all their actions and behaviors. They try to draw a path for their child and plan their future as they wish, not as their child wishes.
Wise parent, your child is not a copy of you that you can mold as you please. They are an independent human being with their own ambitions and feelings. Let them do what they like as long as it is within the bounds of Islam.
3- Your child is not your property
Some parents believe that their child is their property, and they can do whatever they want with them. They may use physical force against their child and hit them, and may insult and use hurtful words towards them. Some parents may even make their child serve them all night and day just because they are their child.
Remember, dear parent, that everything you plant in your child now will be harvested in the future. All the shameful actions will remain a bad memory that your child will remember throughout their life.
.. Being a parent does not mean
Being a parent does not mean that you can mistreat your child and force them to obey your every command without discussion.
You should facilitate your children’s obedience to you, without forcing them to do what they can’t tolerate, and overlook some of their shortcomings towards you.
Be loved by them and avoid giving strict orders continuously. Being a parent is not enough to be loved by all your children without providing them with what strengthens their love for you, such as a smile, a kind word, and feelings of love and tenderness.
Your natural love for your children will not be felt by them without providing evidence of it, as they feel what is apparent from you, not what is inside you.