The Messenger, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, dealt with young children in a manner based on compassion, mercy, softness, and consideration for their conditions. Peace and blessings of God be upon him, he has the best dealings with children. And about his educational methods in dealing with children, we will learn about the opinions of men of psychology, education, and the law through these lines.
The negative messages transmitted by parents may be destructive and may cause sores in their children’s personalities that do not heal and effects that are difficult in the long run to disappear, just as satisfying the children’s need for freedom is through parents finding a comfortable atmosphere, an interlocutor that establishes loyalty to values using the glue of love, and thus is determined calmly, with confidence and definition Freedom and its limits, and such accountability makes the parents’ authorities respected by their children.
respect
Respect for children’s decisions is a requirement, just as it is a requirement for every human being, and respect is a state of feeling self-knowledge and proud of it without arrogance or exaggeration. Parents have an inferior view of their son that suppresses his talents and deprives him of the simplest human advantages, which are the enjoyment of a free idea, a legitimate aspiration, a decent life, a satisfying morsel, and a good night’s sleep.
And that mistreatment of a person will plunge him and his society into psychological and social extremes, the result of which will be a comprehensive loss for all, just as the progress of treatment will arise when the fate of those we deal with rises, and God Almighty said: (Pay with that which is better, and if there is enmity between you and him as if he is an intimate friend), As the Almighty said: (And tell My servants to say that which is better) and as the Almighty said (repay with that which is the best of the bad). As for the little one, there is no way to raise him respectfully except with the respect of those around him, adults and children for him, just as the adults, with what they constitute of the authorities dominating the personality of the little one, will be They have the greatest impact on rebuilding the psyche of the young or destroying it. Perhaps one of the most important ways of conveying respect to the young is through our messages of understanding with him and dialogue.
Conversation with children
The serious attempts to dialogue with the young and understand them reflect many messages that the young take seriously and take seriously, and are committed to their content, because the child believes everything we say to him, and carries it in himself, and because we form authorities that control the destinies of our children and because they are dependent on us in their childhood. For if we tell them something about themselves, it must be the same for them.
And he showed that we, as adults, sometimes feel deeply affected that some of us may have lost balance, frustrated, or perhaps raised our destiny when we listen to the directives, fatwas, or decisions of those we handed over to them from the religious, administrative, or social authorities, and we are mature, rational, and independent. What is the condition of the dependent child who is completely dependent on adults? The child, as Imam Al-Ghazali says: “A precious jewel, and he is a trust in the neck of his parents.” Our poet said, indicating the danger of adults in formulating the psyche of children:
And the young boys in us grow up on what his father used to do.
Dialogue formats
And that the son will live a life of hardship and hardship when he receives negative signals from his father indicating mistrust, or inferior expectations about his abilities.
Creativity laws
Creativity in communication is a serious decision to change towards the ability to win the trust of adolescents, girls, and boys. It is taken by the educator, and the teacher is not strong on it, and the performer is unable to do so.
And that child in the stage of personality formation that begins with adolescence from 7-21 years old need five laws that parents follow to help them communicate with their children easily and creatively, namely: self-sufficiency is a success, reliability is a failure, avoidance of cruelty and coddling, as well as exposure to all areas of creativity, and learning the seeds of Science because it is the lifeline, and using the correct method in their upbringing.
Necessary skills
Skills that parents can apply to reach creativity in communicating flexibly and easily with the teenager, including non-interference in the quality of the son’s friends, unless there is complete knowledge of them, and they have to find an alternative for these friends so that the parents do not infringe on their son’s right to choose his friends, but rather give him the concepts The correct criteria in how to choose friends and then leave him a space of freedom for authentication. As for finding an alternative, the parents should clarify the criteria to the son. For example, the father tells him: Your friend must be loyal to his parents, committed to his prayers, a believer, honest and characterized by good morals, or to make him accompany Groups, not individuals, because the group has diversity, so the choice becomes greater. Therefore, the son must be given the freedom to choose his friends, but within the criteria and concepts that I show him without imposing them on him. Rather, I let him experiment with his heart and mind and live with them with conviction.
One of the ways of creativity
One of the ways of creativity in communicating with children is also using the story in the dialogue to combine the mind and the heart. Stories are among the most successful methods in attracting the attention of the teenager and exciting him, but on the condition that the parents are fluent in the method of dialogue and use the correct means in telling the story.
Understand your son
Appreciation is the beginning of understanding and observance, and then giving plenty of time to our children. As for the elements of appreciation, they are: “understand me,” which is a very important requirement. The second is “take care of me” by respecting the son’s psychology. As for the appreciation of “wait for me,” parents must be patient in their dealings with the son and give him opportunities to Express what he wants and listen to him. As for the “shotgun” element, it is for appreciating the son’s personality, and it relies on monitoring and accountability by making the son’s relationship with the parents official, away from suspense and excitement.
According to the Sunnah of the Prophet
Mercy has been represented in its finest meanings and most beautiful forms in the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, as he is the mercy that is bestowed upon the world.
The Almighty said: (And We did not send you except as a mercy to the worlds – The Prophets: 107) And the mercy of the Holy Prophet included the child and surrounded him, so his mercy towards the child was a method that all servants follow in their dealings with children in general.
A child differs greatly from an adult person, and this difference includes behavior, body, and mind, so God Almighty has lifted the reckoning and punishment of this weak being. He wakes up, and on behalf of the young until he grows up, and on behalf of the afflicted until he becomes sane.”
Childhood is a very sensitive period, so it is necessary to take care of the child during this period and take care of him.
The Messenger of God is loving and sympathetic to the child
The child is in constant need of the sympathy and love of others, just as he is nourished physically to grow and grow, so he needs to be nourished emotionally through those around him, and this is what the master of creation, the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, did not neglect. The Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, kissed al-Hassan ibn Ali, may God be pleased with him, while he was sitting with al-Aqra’ ibn Habis. Al-Aqra’ said: I have ten children, and I have not kissed any of them.
And he used to carry his grandson, Al-Hassan bin Ali bin Abi Talib, put him on his honorable shoulders, caress him, then hugs him and kiss him, and pray to God, saying: “Oh God, I love him, for I love him.”
The Messenger of God playing with children
The child is in constant need of play, adventure, and fun, because of the positive repercussions and effects that have on his personality and thoughts. Play allows him to experiment with abilities, acquire more knowledge, overcome difficulties, and entertain himself.
Here we record the humility of the Holy Prophet, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, with children and their participation in their toys and their distractions. On the authority of Jaber, he said: I entered upon the Prophet, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, while he was walking on four legs, and on his back was Al-Hassan and Al-Hussein, may God be pleased with them both. Narrated by al-Tabarani and others.
The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, thanks the child
He said: It is nice to give our children thanks for the good work they have done.
As gratitude urges them to give more and encourages them to move forward toward doing good and good deeds. The Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, was keen to thank and praise every child who did a good deed.
Ibn Abbas said the Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, included me and said: “O God, teach him the Book.”
Ibn Abbas said: I put an ablution for the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace. He said: Who put this on? So he was told, and he said: Oh God, grant him understanding in religion.
And when Anas served the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, the Prophet, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, prayed for him. He said: Oh God, increase his wealth and his children and bless him in what you gave him.
The Messenger of God sends peace to the children
He added: Many adults ignore children and do not even greet them. The Holy Prophet humbled himself to this group of people and never hesitated to greet them.
The Prophet, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, passed by children playing. He said to them: “Peace be upon you, boys.”
On the authority of Anas bin Malik, may God be pleased with him, that he passed by two boys and greeted them and said: The Prophet used to do that.
He did not deprive them of the participation of adults in peace.
He, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, said: The little one greets the old, the passer-by greets the sitting person, and the few greet the many.
The Messenger of God teaches religion to children
He pointed out that the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, was always seeking to teach religion to children and urge them to learn and know. One day he accompanied Abdullah bin Abbas and said to him: “O boy, I am teaching you words. Save God and He will protect you. Save God and you will find Him towards you. If you ask, ask.” God, and if you seek help, then seek help from God and know that if the nation gathered to benefit you with something, they would not benefit you except with something that God had ordained for you, and if they gathered together to harm you with something, they would not harm you except with something that God had ordained for you.
The Messenger of God, may God bless him and grant him peace, develops children’s imagination
Al-Aqoul concluded by saying that it is nice for children to acquire the ability to visualize and imagine. On the authority of Ibn Omar (may God be pleased with them both), he said: We were with the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, and he said: Tell me of a tree that resembles a Muslim or a Muslim man, whose leaf does not fall and yields its fruit every once in a while. Ibn Omar said: So it occurred to me that it is the palm tree, and I saw Abu Bakr and Omar They do not speak, so I hated to speak, so when they did not say anything, the Messenger of God, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, said: It is the palm tree. When we got up, I said to Omar: O father, by God, it occurred to me that it was the palm tree, so he said: What prevented you from speaking? He said: I did not see you two talking, so I hated to speak or say something. Omar said: Because what you said is more beloved to me than such-and-such.
And what do these children need other than a heart that loves them and a big heart that loves them? Let us adhere to the guidance of the Prophet, may God’s prayers and peace be upon him, in raising our children according to the principles of Islam, and giving them a sound upbringing. Let our goal in this upbringing be to please God.
